by Lisa Cybaniak
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Ending racism is our responsibility – all of ours. It’s not “someone” else’s job – it’s ours, together as a society… as human beings. I mean, how can we honestly stand by knowing that people are being marginalised, beaten, discriminated against, and even losing their lives because of the colour of their skin?
I don’t know about you, but I grew up hearing all kinds of, what I now know to be, racist jokes, songs, and language. It wasn’t until I grew into a teenager that I began to question what I was saying and even thinking about anyone who was different from me. I didn’t like it. This is not who I wanted to be. This is not how I wanted to see others, treat them, or make them feel.
I had a responsibility to make different choices, and that’s exactly what I did and still do. We all have this ability, but it has to start with the awareness that we’re even doing it in the first place. How can you change what you don’t know is broken?
The Black Lives Matter movement that we are currently experiencing is the mirror we all need to be looking into, exposing the deep dark truth that even though we may not see it right in front of our faces, doesn’t mean it’s not there.
Book Journey Mentor and founder of Conscious Dreams Publishing, Daniella (Danni) Blechner is talking openly with us today about her experiences as a black woman in the UK, why the Black Lives Matter movement isn’t discriminating against anyone who isn’t black, why some are triggered by the word privilege, and what we all can do to play our very important role in ending racism in our society.
This is a powerful episode that I truly hope will open the eyes of those currently in the dark, stimulate the conversation and motivate everyone to stand up. The time is now.
So, let’s dive right in!
White Privilege
Personally, I’ve had a few people pop up on social media to contest the notion of white privilege. As you can imagine, so has Danni. We talk extensively in this episode about this and have come to the conclusion that the word privilege seems to provoke a sense of negating the turmoil and hardships they’ve experienced in their life.
Of course, the reality is, we’ve all had hardships. This isn’t a competition. By me admitting that I have white privilege over someone else who isn’t white, doesn’t mean I didn’t experience 10-years of child abuse, and all the subsequent personal torment that followed.
As a woman, I know what it’s like to need to think twice before jogging by myself because we live in a world where women are not safe from predators. That means that males have male privilege over all females, in this regard. However, I don’t know what it’s like to think twice before jogging because of the colour of my skin. Just like I don’t know what it’s like to be taught from a young age by my father how to show subservience to the police, as Danni learned from her father.
Danni shared the perfect story to sum up privilege. She spoke of a party she once held that her disabled friend wasn’t able to attend because they couldn’t access the building. When Danni learned of this after the fact, she immediately knew that she had able-bodied privilege. She didn’t have to think about getting into the venue. It was only once she learned of her friend’s situation that she realised the venue was inaccessible.
That is privilege.
Black Lives Matter
Danni and I also talked extensively about why some people are adamant that Black Lives Matter should be changed to All Lives Matter.
Again, this isn’t a competition. Of course all lives matter, we are fighting for the equal rights of black people right now. It’s akin to men being up in arms during the women’s rights movement. If they were saying, “Yeah, but men’s rights matter too” they of course wouldn’t be wrong. But men’s rights weren’t in jeopardy. MEN weren’t in jeopardy.
We both believe that those who are against the Black Lives Matter slogan are misinterpreting the message, thinking it means that one life matters over another. To these individuals, the sentence continues in their minds: “Black Lives Matter….more than other lives”. That’s just not the case. No more so than with the women’s rights movement mentioned above.
Ending racism is just as much about acknowledging the fact that it exists, as it is about putting steps in place to combat it.
Ending Racism
Just like in so many movements in the past, ending racism and fighting for the rights of all people to be treating equally and justly, is our duty. Us women we obviously successful in the women’s rights movement, not because women alone made the necessary changes. Men had to step up back then and dedicate themselves to the equitable and equal treatment of women, just as white people need to do now for the equitable and equal treatment of black people.
Ending racism is our responsibility. Black people are not responsible for the mistreatment of black people for centuries, no more so than them being responsible for slavery. And while black people all over the world are telling their stories to raise awareness, and protesting to raise motivation for change, it’s going to take the decided action of us all to create the change they deserve.
Of course, this all starts with us as individuals. Becoming aware of our own prejudices and opening our eyes to the inequality around us are the first steps to ending racism. Danni shares several strategies we all need to take in order to end systemic racism.
Discussion
Danni’s first strategy in ending racism is to have open discussions, especially with our children. Teach them about other cultures, how to treat everyone with fairness and love, to respect people, show empathy, and lead from the heart.
We need to teach our children to be open to being wrong, and the best way to do this is to lead by example. Talk to them about some of the thoughts and ideas you once had that you’ve realised were wrong. Show them, first hand, that your views, thoughts and opinions are just that. They are not automatically right just because you have them. It is possible to be wrong – that doesn’t make you a bad person. Instead, it makes you an evolving person.
Stand up
Most importantly, we need to teach our children to stand up to discrimination, inequality, inequity, and racism. When we hear or see something that’s not right, it’s our responsibility to stand up and speak out.
I believe many people simply don’t know what to do to make a difference in ending racism. So, talk about this with your children. Brainstorm appropriate ways to stand up for injustice, in different situations they may face.
Businesses
Danni reminds us that we are dealing with systemic racism. That means the very fabric of our society is built on favouring one against another.
If you’re a business owner, or are in Human Relations, having the ability to hire team members, do you have a diversity and equality policy? Have a look at your current team members. How diverse is the team, really?
Is there more you can be doing to ensure you are diverse and equitable in your hiring and promotion process?
Educate yourself
Other than having the open discussions and teaching our children, as discussed above, the single greatest move you can make towards ending racism, in my opinion, is to educate yourself.
As a white woman who did well in school, I thought I knew history. I don’t. I know the small portion of history that was presented to me as part of my education. It’s now time for me to educate myself through reading, watching documentaries and films based on true events, and having open and honest conversations.
Danni provides us with a list of four books and three films, off the top of her head, that are a great place to start. I’ve provided this list at the bottom of this blog, with links, where applicable, for you to easily access them.
If you take nothing else from this podcast episode or blog, please take this: We don’t know what we don’t know. Educate yourself and then start conversing. Ending racism is possible when we all do our part.
More from this episode
Danni and I talk in much more detail about all things white privilege and Black Lives Matter. Danni also openly shares a few of her experiences with racism, both directly and indirectly. She shares examples of a boyfriend being stopped by police outside her home, being humiliated for just walking down the street, as well as how her father taught her how to be subservient when interacting with police. And of course, Danni goes into much more detail on the part we can all play in the ending of racism in our lifetime.
Press play on the episode above to get all the details!
Follow Daniella Blechner
You can learn more about Danni and Conscious Dreams Publishing on her website. You can also follow Danni on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn
Educational Links
These are the links for the books and films Danni spoke of in this epsiode. All links are for Amazon.co.uk. Please search for these resources in your country if you live outside the UK.
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Voice over credit: Shari Vandermolen. Shari is offering a free download of one of her songs to the fans of the Life Like You Mean It podcast! Just visit www.GiftFromShari.com and tell her where to send it. Shari’s debut album is available for streaming on all the major platforms including Spotify and iTunes.
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